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Monday, October 17, 2005 

How to properly medicate a cat

  1. Watch IrishTenor demonstrate holding cat on his lap, lubricating pill with butter, prying cat's mouth open, popping pill into cat's mouth, and holding cat's mouth closed until he swallows.
  2. Wonder whether you can duplicate procedure by yourself; conjecture no.
  3. Arrive at IrishTenor's house the next evening; locate cat, medication, and butter.
  4. Seat yourself on living room couch and summon cat.
  5. Realize that cat is under coffee table and therefore is out of reach.
  6. Get up; lure cat out from under table.
  7. Pick up cat and seat him on your lap.
  8. Scrape butter onto pill.
  9. Try to pry cat's mouth open.
  10. Jump violently when someone knocks on the door, dog explodes into loud barking, and cat flees, digging his hind claws into your thigh as he goes.
  11. Locate and soothe cat.
  12. Repeat Steps 4, 7, and 9.
  13. Give up when you realize cat will not cooperate.
  14. Enlist the aid of IrishTenor's roommate.
  15. Have roommate restrain cat while you try to pry cat's mouth open; experience fear of losing finger when cat's ears fly back as a result of annoyance.
  16. Watch pill go flying due to being too well buttered.
  17. Recover pill from floor.
  18. Attempt another prying of cat's mouth while cat is restrained by roommate.
  19. Repeat Steps 16 and 17.
  20. Applaud roommate's brilliance when he suggests wrapping pill in cheese.
  21. Enfold pill in small piece of Kraft Single.
  22. Watch in awe as cat gobbles down cheese, pill and all.
  23. Repeat Steps 21 and 22 twice daily until IrishTenor's return.

9:52 PM |

If it was my cat, I wouldn't have made it out alive.

Posted by Blogger Monalicious | 10:30 PM, October 17, 2005   

Careful with the cheese, it's bad for them.

Careful of the teeth/claws, it's bad for you.

Don't be careful of the teeth/claws, it's funny for us.

Posted by Blogger Arbusto | 7:34 AM, October 18, 2005   

And the cat just got wise to the fact that there was a pill embedded in the cheese. Luckily there was a can of tuna in the refrigerator.

Cat successfully duped; tuna is now in a tupperware container bearing the label, "For cat bribing use ONLY! (I owe someone a can of Starkist Chunk Light Tuna)"

Posted by Blogger SouthernCanadian | 9:03 AM, October 18, 2005   

Haahaa - Good Stuff.

In all seriousness, I had the same problem while trying to sedate my tarded-cat for a 1000 mile trip.

What finally worked for me was going to a pharmacy and picking up a suspension dropper thinger (used to give babies medication). Crush the pill up and mix it with a bit of water in the suspension dropper. Then, have a friend, who isn't a real friend, rather just someone you would like to see your cat mess with. Have that person hold your cat, put the dropper in the side of your cat's mouth, and wham-o.... medicated kitty!

Best of luck to you!

Posted by Blogger Lex Fori | 7:04 PM, October 20, 2005   

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